Sort of like a fuzzy navel …

October 12, 2009 at 8:43 pm (Babies, Etiquette, Family, Motherhood)

I was changing my son’s diaper today when I noticed he had some fuzz on his body. On the tip of his penis, to be exact. Now, this raises an interesting issue for me as a mother or maybe it’s for all of us as a society. I’m not sure. Maybe we have all gotten over-sensitive if a mother cannot handle (I wish I could think of a better word.) matters pertaining to her son’s penis without feeling awkward. He’s only two months old. It’s tiny. (No offense, kid.) However, it took about ten tries for me to get that fuzz off of his penis. I felt so awkward that I kept trying to remove the fuzz without actually touching his genitalia, which worked about as well as it sounds like it would. (The fuzz removal, not his genitals. I have no idea how well they function, except that he seems to have no trouble peeing, preferably with his diaper off. ) I even called my husband right before I managed to finally, successfully, remove it.

Max (That is my son’s name. I am in the process of rendering this blog un-anonymous, but haven’t had time to update my “About” page.) was seemingly oblivious to all of this. However, I veered between feelings of awkwardness over having to touch him when not changing his diaper or bathing him (even for fuzz removal purposes) and fears that I would accidentally hurt him. During one of my desperate, spastic attempts to remove the fuzz, I felt like I accidentally tugged too sharply on his poor little penis. I decided he would have let me know if I had, though. As for any awkwardness, I’ve discussed this with other parents and it seems to be something we all feel. Especially with a child of the opposite sex. Just comes with the territory. I wonder, though, if it ever stops being awkward? Or becomes less awkward?

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When it rains, it pours

October 7, 2009 at 11:37 pm (Babies, Flu)

All of this coughing has not helped the post-baby incontinence problem. It really sucks to not be able to hold your pee. Since Max was born, I have not been able to laugh, cough, or sneeze without peeing myself (some of the time). As if having the flu wasn’t bad enough, they tell you to drink lots of fluids when you’ve just had a baby, can’t stop coughing, and can’t always go to the bathroom when you want or need to, thanks to the aforementioned baby. Not to mention that I can’t laugh without coughing right now, which just compounds the problem. Is there no end to the universe’s ability to f*** with new mothers??

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We’ve been bit

October 4, 2009 at 11:36 pm (Babies, Family, Flu, Illness, Life, Motherhood)

by the flu bug. My son and I both have the flu. His is probably H1N1. However, that one is apparently not as dangerous as the regular flu, despite the hype. We were at Dell Children’s Hospital from midnight to 6 a.m. trying to find out what was wrong. Despite the horrible wait, the doctors and nurses were wonderful once we finally got some help. Their cheerful attitudes at 4 a.m., despite an ER packed with cranky patients, are an inspiration.

I hope some of that cheer rubs off on me, because I am feeling pretty pessimistic about the coming week right now. I am really not looking forward to being alone and sick with a sick baby. I know I will do what I have to do, but it will be hard. I already got a taste of it last week. Even though my husband works at home, he still has to actually work most of the time and lately that has included evenings and weekends. Please send good thoughts and prayers our way.

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Lucky little boy

September 27, 2009 at 5:49 pm (Babies, Family, Fathers, Husbands, Life, Motherhood, Parenting)

I am so, so grateful that my son has a wonderful father who will be there for him his whole life. My father left when I was 13 and was never really around after that. In fact, he was never really around before he left. He was usually on business trips and when he was home, he was either asleep or locked in the bathroom. Or we wished he was asleep or locked in the bathroom.

Due to those experiences, one of my goals in life was to make sure my children had a father they could depend on. I know children can do fine without a father. My mother is one of the best women on earth, maybe THE best, and I marvel more and more everyday (especially since I’ve had my own child) at the bravery and sheer guts she displayed in striking out on her own and taking care of us. Luckily, she was only on her own a few years before my stepdad showed up, but she sacrificed a great deal for us before and after her remarriage and I will be forever grateful. Due to that example, I knew children could be great with a single parent and I might have gone that route if I had had to wait much longer for my husband.

Fortunately, my Prince Charming came along and now I have my beautiful baby boy. I finally have everything I really wanted (except possibly more kids, but we’ll wait a couple of years at least before we do anything about that). My baby boy has a terrific daddy AND he gets to have my mom for a grandmother. And those two are not the only wonderful family members he has. I think my son is set. (No pun intended.)

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Random quote for the day

September 27, 2009 at 5:42 pm (Babies, Clothes, Life)

“Baby clothes keep falling out of my clothes.”

– Spoken to my husband as I attempted to get ready for postnatal yoga this morning

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Baby mine

September 23, 2009 at 12:03 am (Babies, Family, Motherhood, Parenting, Relationships)

I’ve decided I don’t appreciate this biological hooey where the baby looks like the dad the first few months, so that the father can be sure the baby’s his. Not only is it insulting to the mother, but it’s also just plain not fair. I carried my son for forty-one and a half weeks and spent 12 hours giving birth to him. (Drug-free, thankyouverymuch.) I’ve been breast-feeding him round-the-clock for almost two months now. Also, he has all of my facial features. My eyes, my nose, my mouth, even my forehead. Yet, he looks like my husband! Only one person has said he looks like me! I know it shouldn’t matter, but come on. I’ve already put a year of my life in to this kid. He’s half mine. By rights, it should be more, considering all of the extra effort I put in. 😉 He’s already got my husband’s last name! Where’s the MOM’S evidence that the baby is hers?? Believe it or not, we need some reassurance on that point, too.

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Three clumsiest things I’ve done this week (so far!)

September 22, 2009 at 11:52 pm (Babies, Breastfeeding, Cats, Food, Life, Motherhood)

1. Tried to eat some Smart Ones fettucine alfredo too fast (in order to finish before the baby’s next feeding) and flipped the fork out of my hand, hitting CC in the leg.

2. Knocked over a bottle of breast milk and spilled it all over the floor and a tote bag.

3. Stepped on Earl Grey’s paw.

What will happen next? More specifically, what will happen to Fudgie? He’s the only cat I haven’t managed to inadvertently injure this week. (Actually, they’re fine, thank goodness.)

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Free to breast-feed

September 19, 2009 at 2:44 pm (Babies, Breastfeeding, Etiquette, Life, Motherhood, Parenting, Uncategorized)

My son and I finally made it to our first postnatal yoga class today. I didn’t actually end up doing much yoga because my son, like most almost-two-month-olds, needs to eat every three hours. Also, he takes about 40 minutes to  nurse. I admit, this has kept me from attending the class before, because I didn’t want to spend most of it nursing instead of doing yoga. However, the writing is on the wall. I’m not going to be able to do anything unless I am willing to feed him during some part of it. So I went, but I took a bottle of breast milk with me, since he usually bottle-feeds quicker than he nurses.

My son has taken a bottle from me several times and he usually gets at least one a day from my husband, so that I can have a break. However, he wouldn’t take it today. So, since several other women were nursing their babies, I decided to go ahead and nurse him.

At first, I felt self-conscious nursing without a cover in public. However, I soon became completely comfortable with it. In fact, I felt liberated. Before I had a child, I was fine with women breast-feeding in public, although I assumed it would be best for them to cover themselves up, to avoid catching flack from people. I thought it must be easy to just toss a cover over yourself and the baby. I was wrong. I have a nursing cover. It is very difficult to get the child in and out of the cover without exposing yourself somehow anyway. You either have to flash people or place the child under there and then fumble with your clothes, blind and one-handed. Also, it is sweltering under there (I can only imagine what it feels like for my son.) and trying to get him latched back on  five thousand times while I can’t see him makes me want to pull my hair out.

Everyone says “breast is best.” They want all of the moms to breast-feed because it is better for the babies, but most people would prefer you stay trapped in the house for three months doing it. I’m sorry, but that is just not realistic. If people are going to get judgmental about a mom not breast-feeding, then they shouldn’t be judgmental about a mom doing it in public. A mom still has to have a life while breast-feeding, especially if she has other kids and/or a job. Plus, it’s better for both mom and baby if they aren’t trapped in the house 24/7. For the first time today, I didn’t feel limited by breast-feeding. I didn’t feel trapped. I actually felt like I was breast-feeding and living at the same time. I didn’t feel like I had to drop everything to feed my child. I didn’t have to stop my life. I was sharing my life with him.

Honestly, I think most moms probably aren’t self-conscious about nursing without a cover. At least, like me, they would find out they weren’t once they tried it. I think it is other people’s attitudes that make a mom self-conscious, rather than her own feelings. It’s not what the mom or baby is doing, but other people’s thoughts about breasts that are the problem. The fact is, I had to look really closely at the moms in class today to tell if they were nursing, even without covers. They were very discreet about it. They weren’t flashing their breasts around or letting them hang out when a child wasn’t latched to them. The fact is, our society is prudish and many think of breasts purely as sexual objects. Come on, people. It’s breast-feeding, not flashing your boobs to get Mardi Gras beads. And yet, some of the same people who probably pay money for those Girls Gone Wild DVDs, give nursing mothers dirty looks in public.

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Slow and not so steady

September 16, 2009 at 9:31 pm (Babies, Life, Motherhood, Parenting)

I never thought it would be possible for me to take longer to leave the house than I did before my son was born. I was wrong. Before, I took too long because I would oversleep or meander around, giving in to my obsessive-compulsive tendencies and checking everything over and over. Now I get up two or three hours early, rush around madly, and am STILL sometimes late or miss whatever event I am trying to attend entirely.

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Diaper-changing on the road

September 14, 2009 at 5:27 am (Babies, Drivers, Family, Motherhood, Parenting, Relationships, Travel)

Picture, if you will, a Brookshire Bros. grocery store in Buffalo, TX. A young couple are in the parking lot attempting to change their newborn’s diaper. Actually, the mom was driving, so she is in the front changing the diaper while the child lies in the front passenger seat. Almost everything that can go wrong does.

First – The child in question keeps pushing off the back of the seat with his feet. Consequently, his head is already hanging off of the seat before his mother even has his diaper off.

Second – The mother mentions that her open can of Diet Coke is in danger of being sprayed if the cloth diaper covering her son’s penis does not effectively block the spray if he pees. Due to extreme sleep deprivation, she does not notice her husband reaching right in front of her and removing the can.

Third – Her elbow strikes something on the console between the seats while she is trying to wipe her wriggling son’s butt and keep the makeshift “pee-pee teepee” in place. At first, she thinks it is the bottle of formula her husband was feeding her son moments before. However, she soon discovers it is her can of Diet Coke, which is now upside down between the well and the passenger seat, covering the floorboard with Diet Coke.

Fourth – Wife yells at husband “Why in the world did you put that there???” Husband proceeds to calmly tell wife not to yell at him as Diet Coke continues to leak on the floorboard.

Fifth – One of the parents (Can’t remember which one.) finally collects their scattered wits long enough to grab the Diet Coke can. Mother tells father to stop telling her to quit yelling at him and help her clean up the Diet Coke on the changing pad before son puts his foot in it.

Six – Mother explains to father that she wasn’t trying to yell, just exclaiming in wonderment over the fact that he thought it was a good idea to put the Diet Coke can there. He’s usually smarter than that. That’s what sleep deprivation will do to you, kiddies.

Seven – Father helps clean up the Diet Coke, goes to grocery store gas station to get paper towels.

Eight – Son spits up as soon as father leaves. Mother is still holding him on front seat. Burp cloth is in backseat.

Nine – Mother makes do with a wipe until father returns, retrieves burp cloth, and finishes the job. Afterwards, mother realizes she no longer knows which cloth diaper is “pee-pee teepee” and which is burp cloth.

Ten – Son is returned to backseat unscathed. Parents have a good laugh at themselves. Son laughs at parents from car seat. Parents drive out of the parking lot after that stunning display of mental acuity and coordination.

Although it doesn’t sound like it from that story, our first trip as a family went very well this weekend! Our son barely fussed in the car. He is the most amazing baby ever.

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